Be kiasu: put couplet before
octet. Buang rhyme. Rhyme

is ruse, like when you get napkin with

button. Nice right? But useless. Also tak perlu:

your footnote, your traffic light, your crystal

scry. Love zhen de mei you instruction, like when

mat give you hammer ask you make ice-
cube. Tau takpe. But still get free hammer lah.

No need to Shakespeare Shakespeare, zuo bo

at void deck wherefore art thou xiao mei mei.

Everything must go—but don’t go courthouse.

Sonnet not there. Look under fern at

Botanic Garden. Check your napkin,
the one got button. Button need hole.









We Are Majulah is anjing tengok pantat—pandai making a loop of itself. Former morning assembly mumble-lah Singapura I love nasi lomak kepala otak kau. Psychomotor stamping he sibeh heng purple light bu yong subtitle. Globetrotting angmo lang cannot eat ice kacang because ice upside down. Can prosciutto prosecco cannot bakwa and beer. Can confirm go restroom but cannot go toilet. Can tell you what is tassel. Cannot tell you what is home.









How to show mountain? Wo bu shi
wordsmith, bu shi Wordsworth—see

Alps ni zhi dao how to write meh? Here
no practice: Bukit Timah not Mount Biang

not Mont Blanc. Describe cannot half-price
then upsize. Mei you sublime funsize,

mei you Merlion alpine edition. So left

with: money. Big camera. Every year

take picture. Every year come back collect
homework. But cannot hand in. Every year

go remedial no ending.









Write statement for what? If write must

sign. Must appear on TV say sorry sorry


ah kong. Sotong. You think if you write

you must follow other people. If they


makan potato, you swallow starch—hah

I cannot use starch? Should I cave in


to your force of habit, sight scanning

line swooning over turns and tricks?


Ok. Statement is metaphor for tuition,

for textbook, for discount sticker label


at Fairprice. Use your brain. If got formula

we sure export already lah bodoh. Kan dah


kena bodoh. Don’t ask me for footnote. When

you read English you look up. They always


tell you speak up boy, speak up. Now I speak up.